Imposter syndrome can take many forms, but most of us will feel it at some point in our lives. Constantly feel like you're about to be ‘found out’? That someone will pick you out of a crowd at work or a party and ask what you're doing there? That's imposter syndrome, and it can strike anyone (including Lady Gaga, Sheryl Sandberg and Maisie Williams), at anytime, but it's particularly prevalent among women.
What is imposter syndrome?
Imposter syndrome refers to those unfounded feelings of self doubt and incompetence that we can feel at any point, and in any aspect of our lives - from work to friendships. It describes someone who feels they aren't as capable as others think and fears it's only a matter of time before they are exposed as a fraud.
Even if you're an expert in your field, have trained for years and seen success, it can still creep up - because, it's not based in reality, but insecurity. Women are more susceptible to imposter syndrome in the workplace because we've been conditioned by patriarchy and society to believe that our male counterparts have more right to be there. If we don't see many examples of people who look like us or share our background who are clearly succeeding in our field of work, then that can create unease.
Even Michelle Obama feels it. Speaking at a North London school for the UK leg of her book tour, she said: “I had to overcome the question ‘am I good enough?’” adding that “I overcame that question the same way I do everything – with hard work,” she continued. “I decided to put my head down and let my work speak for itself. I felt like I had something to prove because of the colour of my skin and the shape of my body, but I had to get out of my own way.”
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Characteristics of imposter syndrome
As mentioned above, the main characteristics of Imposter Syndrome include not thinking as though you are capable enough within work or relationships, and a feeling you will someday be ‘found out’ as a fraud who doesn't really know what they're doing. You may also experience a loss in confidence or low self-esteem, intense fear of failure and an increased likelihood of burnout due to overworking.
To really get to know whether you may be experiencing a form of Imposter Syndrome, according to Dr Young, there are five kinds of imposter syndrome personalities recognised. These are:
1. The perfectionist
2. The natural genius
3. The rugged individualist
4. The expert
5. The superhero
While they have a great deal in common, each of these groups experiences the phenomenon in a slightly different way and will require slightly different methods to overcome the impact of imposter syndrome on their lives. In the next few pages, we’ll outline the five types of “imposters” and explain how to tailor your approach to suit your own type.
“Perfectionism” is often listed as a key indicator of imposter syndrome, so it’s common that people who experience one also experience the other. In her book, Dr Valerie Young explains that perfectionists typically set very high expectations for themselves and that even if they meet 99% of those goals, a small loss will feel like a large failure. When mistakes happen, perfectionists question their core competence, which can easily translate to feelings of imposter syndrome.
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What to do if this is you:
The most important approach for this group is to learn to accept your mistakes or to see them as an inevitable part of larger successes. Try tuning in to the podcast How to Fail with Elizabeth Day, a series that interviews celebrities on their three biggest “failures” and in turn explains how they were crucial to the success they’ve achieved today. Celebrating your achievements is also key to maintaining perspective and avoiding emotional burnout.
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The “natural genius” has been top of the class for as long as they can remember, and in their school days, success came relatively easily. As they grow and mature, however, they are bound to encounter scenarios where achievement doesn’t present itself as second nature, and hard work or struggle is required for their desired results. As they aren’t used to this, natural geniuses tend to suffer from imposter syndrome, feeling that the struggle to meet their goals is a sign that they lack ability and aren’t “good enough.”
What to do if this is you:
Natural geniuses should focus on seeing themselves as a “work in progress”. Think about people with skills you admire and consider the journey they have undertaken to get to where they are now. Talented musicians, for example, once picked up an instrument and were unable to play a note. Challenge yourself to practise the kind of skills you don’t master immediately, rather than labelling them as something you simply “can’t do.” Do you know people who excel in that area? Ask them about their early struggles, or about the ways in which they improved their skills. You’ll soon realize that everybody begins somewhere, and that the journey to proficiency is to be applauded just as much as the end result.
Does asking for help trigger your imposter syndrome? Do you struggle to see something as a success unless you have achieved it by yourself? You’re most likely a “rugged individualist”. These kinds of “imposters” struggle to reach out when they need assistance, as they feel getting help with a task invalidates their contribution or shows that their own skillset is in some way lacking.
Knowing when to ask for help is a vital skill, not only in work but in life too. Asking for help is never a weakness – in fact, knowing ourselves well enough to understand when help is required can be one of our greatest strengths. It’s far more efficient, after all, to ask for help with a task than it is to spend twice as long struggling through by ourselves.
What to do if this is you:
If you’re in need of some inspiration, speak to someone you look up to and ask them what the value of other people’s contributions has been to their success. Far from the image you may have of them as a lone maverick achiever, you’re sure to hear glowing stories of the people who have helped them along the way.
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If you’re an “expert” type, you probably prefer to spend time researching and gathering as much information as possible before you start a new project. You like to come into something new from a position of knowledge and expertise, and you probably regularly spend time looking for ways to improve your skillset or undergo extra training. However, this drive to become an “expert” can trigger imposter syndrome, holding you back from applying for jobs if you don’t meet all the criteria in the description, or preventing you from speaking up in a seminar because you’re afraid that your answer won’t be perfectly informed.
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What to do if this is you:
Making an effort to move away from “hoarding” knowledge, and instead learning on-the-go can be a good way to challenge the behaviours that trigger feeling like an imposter. Recognising that you’re capable of improvising and learning knowledge in a shorter time frame will instil you with greater confidence in your abilities and develop your sense of worthiness.
“Superheroes” push themselves to work harder than everyone around them to prove that they’re not imposters. Their expectations for themselves are higher than their expectations of others, and they feel a sometimes overwhelming need to succeed in every element of their life – at work and at home. Their feelings of imposter syndrome will be triggered when one of these areas is not as strong as another. Working harder than others to prove your worthiness, or to cover up feelings of being an imposter, can quickly lead to burnout, and be detrimental to your mental health.
What to do if this is you:
Try to learn to resist the lure of external validation as the measure by which you gauge your self-worth and draw healthy boundaries between your work and private time. You can find advice for setting boundaries on page 153. Finding other ways to define your identity beyond “success”, through new hobbies or routines, is another good way to ease the pressure that comes with this kind of imposter syndrome.
Many people will find that they identify with several, or even all, of these forms of imposter syndrome. The good news is that the more “types” that speak to you, the more practical solutions for overcoming your imposter syndrome are unlocked. The “types” shouldn’t limit your approach to impostorism but offer a tailored guide to finding solutions.
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How to overcome imposter syndrome
Just because it's normal, doesn't mean that we should all just accept imposter syndrome as part of our everyday lives, there are all sorts of things we can do to help ease the feelings around our own worth and ability.
Very often we take our thoughts and feelings as fact without actually ever finding the evidence to support them. Very often, imposter syndrome can be tackled by taking a negative thought and asking yourself whether you have any physical evidence to believe that, or whether it's just your mind playing tricks again.
You can also do the same with positive evidence, so take a thought linked to imposter syndrome and find evidence why this likely isn't true.
Sharing your impostor feelings with others can not only reduce loneliness but also open doors for others to share what they see in you and help reassure you that your beliefs are unfounded. If it's related to work, you might want to pick a colleague you trust, or a friend in a similar industry who will understand. It could also be a professional who you choose to share with, from a therapist to a careers coach, they will help you unpick your thought process.
People who struggle with impostor feelings tend to brush off their successes, which only exacerbates the experience. If someone congratulates you, make a mental note of that (or even a physical note in your phone). Our brains are hardwired to remember the negative due to our inherent survival instinct, but we're not as good as retaining the positive.
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You might want to make an email folder of any praise you receive at work, so that when those imposter feelings arise, you can combat them with all the positive praise you've received that prove otherwise.
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This is a crucial one. Imposter Syndrome breeds in negative head spaces, meaning the more we think we are failures or aren't doing any good, the more this can become our reality. Instead of being hard on yourself if something may go seemingly ‘wrong,’ try to reframe the situation into a learning opportunity, and just a part of life's ups and downs.
As mentioned above, it's important to celebrate small successes in order to create a more positive outlook on the whole. Focus on these wins rather than honing in on any perceived 'failures',' and be kind to yourself when you do think bad thoughts. For example, instead of thinking, “I did a terrible job in today's presentation, which must mean I don't know what I'm doing in this job,” try to instead tell yourself: “I may not have done my best work today but I am human and I will do better next time. This does not mean I am bad at my job, just that there is opportunity for growth.”
You don’t have to lower the bar, but adjusting your standards for success can make it easier to see and internalise your accomplishments. Focus on your progress rather than aiming for perfection, for example, and when you don’t meet your standards, try to remember that it's likely that you expect more from yourself than anyone else.
They say comparison really is the thief of joy, and this is nowhere more true than in Imposter Syndrome. Many of us may have the tendency to look to other people in our field and see them as inherently ‘better’ at what they do. This will do no good for your self-esteem, and can in fact be increasingly damaging to your mental wellbeing.
Try to remember that most nobody really knows what they are doing in life, and rather than comparing yourself to others or feeling jealous, use them as inspiration to become as confident in yourself as you can be. We are all on our own path and have our own skills, intricacies and individual achievements.
As you learn to work through imposter syndrome, it will probably interfere less with your wellbeing. But taming impostor feelings doesn’t mean they’ll never show up again. Many women experience them when they move jobs, return from maternity leave or the team around them changes. We’re always going to be faced with new experiences or roles, but recognising that you can have these feelings come up but still have progressed in helping free yourself from imposter syndrome can exist simultaneously, and remind yourself of the last time you felt like this and how you overcame it and now feel completely different about that past situation.
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